Greener grass won't grow in the desert.

 The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be. - Robert Fulghum


 This last week has been full of grumbles and stress. Besides being broke we're a family of three who needs to be at three different places on complete opposite sides of town and we only have one vehicle. Then that vehicle is falling apart.

We haven't been financially in a spot where we can afford another vehicle, yet. We're paying our bills and trying to keep our heads above water but things are worse than they were last year at this time. It's been very stressful, and honestly I don't deal well with this kind of stress.

I get frustrated when I can't fix things immediately and I want to just curl up into a ball until it goes away. But I don't, instead I hustle to get freelance jobs, book extra shows, sell whatever extra crap I have laying around the house, and try to keep myself busy so I don't feel helpless and lazy.

Sometimes I seriously regret our move from Sacramento to Las Vegas in 2008. I especially regret it when we're broke, when the supposed family and friends I had here completely let me down, and when I want to hide out in the wilderness. I feel like I've been watering the grass, but the desert heat won't let it grow.